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Weekly Standard: Today's Skype discussion includes guests John, a father of five children, Debbie the drunk, a... drunk..., and Grande Miguel, an expert on eating sticks of butter and making fun of deeply held religious beliefs.
Our topic today will be on religious standards of modesty, and how they affect society.
Let's start with John... John, you've been a vocal advocate of modesty standards, what can you tell us about how this has affected your family?
John: Certainly... Even young children can learn the importance of respecting their bodies by dressing appropriately. In my family, we avoid problematic shifts in modesty expectations by being consistent the whole time.
Weekly Standard: So that includes covering the entire body?
John: I mean, we don't wear masks and bonnets... but we don't have trouble finding nice clothes that have reasonable necklines and sleeves for our girls, or neat, clean, appropriately-styled shirts and pants for our boys.
Debbie the drunk: You just want to sexualize your daughters (hiccup)... you like looking at her shorn poulders... I mean porn shoulders... (hiccup)
Weekly Standard: Debbie, it's 9 AM... are you already... intoxicated?
Debbie the drunk: I... I just... I just threw up a little bit in my mouth... (hiccup) And then I swallowed it... so it's OK...
Weekly Standard: OK Grande Miguel... do you have some insight on how modesty standards affect society?
Grande Miguel: Of course, I'm a little weirded out by John insisting that his daughter need to cover her shoulders at a very young age. Obviously a girl that age hasn't developed yet, and should not be forced into fashion standards that are based on the sexual impulses of people around her. I also think it's odd that John is so worried about shoulders in general. They don't need to be covered.
Weekly Standard: John, what would you say in response?
John: Like I said, consistency is a good thing. My wife and I live by the same standards, and we teach our children to be respectful of themselves and others, and part of that is dressing appropriately. I guess I'm also a little creeped out by Grande Miguel being so interested in seeing my daughter's shoulders.
Debbie the drunk: Ha! I knew it! You just (hiccup).
Weekly Standard: Just what Debbie the drunk?
Debbie the drunk: Who are you? Hey... I've gotta get another... (hiccup)
Weekly Standard: It appears that Debbie the drunk has wandered away from her camera.
Grande Miguel: I'm not the one trying to cover her shoulders! John is! John is the one who has to make everyone cover their shoulders!
John: Grande Miguel... am I the one who made you cover your shoulders? You're wearing a very very large shirt...
Weekly Standard: While that's a compelling point John we don't want to...
Grande Miguel: You can't cover my shoulders John! I don't have a problem with... just let me get this...
Weekly Standard: No Grande Miguel! Please keep your shirt on!
John: That does not look healthy...
Weekly Standard: We at the Weekly Standard would like to apologize to all those who saw that before we ended the Skype call... I'm being told that the CDC was notified, and is en route to Grande Miguel's location. In spite of the circumstances at the end of the show, we do want to thank our guests for bringing their perspectives to this issue.
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