Satire: Former Member Who Spent All Their Time With People Who Hate Their Faith Claims DezNat Pushed Them Away From The Church

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Former Member Who Spent All Their Time With People Who Hate Their Faith Claims DezNat Pushed Them Away From The Church

I can't believe people defend those DezNat types...  The memes they use are literal hate crimes, and they do more to push people out of the church than anyone else.

I should know, since I used to be a member of the church.  Then I started talking to my blue-haired rainbow-flag-bearing friends who protested around the church office building on Tuesdays and Thursdays.  They were so accepting of me... I mean, not of my religion, which they despised, but they seemed eager to encourage me to get drunk with them and "discover myself" beyond the restrictive "law of chastity."

That's when #DezNat came and said hateful things like "maybe you should follow the prophet," or "the Family: A Proclamation to the World is founded on unchanging doctrine," or "the enemies of the church claim they are happy, but they certainly don't act like they are..."

Anyway, after waking up with a hangover at the house of some guy I don't know, I had an epiphany... maybe the church isn't for me.  I immediately realized that it was the fault of #DezNat that I left.  If they had been more accepting of my desire to get wasted and ignore all the standards with which I was raised, I would probably still be at church.

Plus, I'm way happier now... or at least when I'm too drunk to cry myself to sleep...

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Satire: Some People Are Sensitive About Being Called Racist Evil Bigots Every Other Week For Years

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Some People Are Sensitive About Being Called Racist Evil Bigots Every Other Week For Years

by Baker L.

I can't believe how sensitive some people get over little things...  I mean, I had a falling out with a couple of guys, a few years back, no big deal, right?  It's the internet, things get misunderstood, you go back and forth with some banter, no problem, right?

And I did the logical thing... a measured response... which was to go after anyone who had ever associated with them, and to call them evil racist hateful bigots who deserve to lose their livelihoods.

Just because I enthusiastically cheered when moms and dads lost their jobs and were attacked by people who threatened them with physical harm doesn't mean they have to be upset...  Touchy!

And after all of these people generally quieted down, relegated to hidden corners of the internet with almost no exposure, I spent every couple of weeks for the next couple of years calling them racist evil bigots who got what they deserved.  And sure, maybe I said some things that weren't true about some of them most of them almost any of them, I don't know why they're so upset...

Anyway, if you see any of these sensitive types saying "that's not true" or "why do you keep misrepresenting us?" just remember that I'm the one trying to establish love and kindness, and they are evil racist bigots who deserve whatever bad things happen to them.

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