<satire>
Point-Counterpoint - Are People Leaving the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints?
Point - People are leaving the church in droves
by Bryan Morteson
The church is gasping its last breaths. It has certainly lasted longer than I thought it would, but there is something different about the youth in this generation - they don't just listen to their parents. I can't think of another time in history when that has happened.
People in our generation value authenticity, which is why everything is so much more trustworthy now than it has been in the past - except for the church. They proclaim "unchanging doctrine" but then do things like change from 3-hour to 2-hour meetings! So much for being "built upon the rock..."
Plus, the prophet is almost 100 years old... Based on my thorough reading of the scriptures and church history, there is little chance for the church to recover if President Nelson were to pass away. I'm counting down the days until I can finally tell church members "I told you so."
Counterpoint - The church is growing at alarming rates, and something must be done to stop them before it's too late
also by Bryan Morteson
The church just keeps acquiring money and property and loyalty from people, and it drives me crazy! Maybe there's something wrong with the youth in this generation - maybe they're not listening to the experts. I can't think of another time in history when that has happened.
People in our generation must be suckers, which is why there are so many more scams and hollow promises than there were in the past - especially the church. They just keep harping on the same "read the Book of Mormon and pray to God" or "follow Jesus Christ..." So much for staying relevant in modern times...
Plus, the prophet is almost 100 years old... how does he keep going? Is he immortal? Has he spent tithing funds on a Lazarus Pit like in Batman? If the public doesn't wake up to the threat of their desire to become better than I will only be able to say "I told you so."
</satire>